Permission to Filter: Why Setting Media Boundaries Is an Act of Self-Care
In recent weeks, I've found myself repeatedly drawn into intense and heavy media content. My news feed filled with global conflicts, environmental disasters, and political turmoil. TV shows and documentaries featuring unimaginable tragedies. Social media debates that grow increasingly heated and personal.
And I've noticed something important: the more I consume this type of content, the more it affects my nervous system, my mood, and my capacity to be present in my own life.
This experience has reminded me of the vital importance of setting boundaries around the content we consume—especially for those of us who it may be touching on deeper, still painful wounding.
The Challenge of Boundaries in the Information Age
There's a particular kind of guilt that comes with limiting your media consumption. I sometimes feel self-conscious about not always knowing the latest news or being up-to-date on every global situation. Anyone else? In a world that often equates awareness with responsibility, choosing to step back can feel like you're somehow not doing your part.
But here's what I've come to understand: expanded awareness of global suffering, especially when you're healing from unresolved trauma, can be actively harmful to your well-being.
This isn't just a hunch. Research backs this up. A 2023 study published in the Journal of Traumatic Stress found that repeated exposure to distressing news content can lead to symptoms similar to post-traumatic stress, particularly in individuals with pre-existing trauma histories. The researchers termed this phenomenon "secondary traumatic stress"—the emotional duress that results from hearing about the traumatic experiences of others.
When Empathy Becomes Overwhelming
For those of us who care deeply about others, this creates a confusing paradox. How can we be compassionate citizens while protecting our own mental health? If we care so much, shouldn't we be willing to witness the suffering?
The truth is more nuanced. As trauma specialist Bessel van der Kolk points out in his book "The Body Keeps the Score," our capacity for empathy actually diminishes when we're in a state of overwhelm. When our nervous systems are flooded, we become less able to take meaningful action—not more.
The approach we take in The Cozy Method suggests this same principle: creating intentional boundaries around media consumption may actually support greater capacity for real-world compassion and action. By protecting our nervous systems from constant activation, we potentially create more space to be present with loved ones, engage meaningfully in our communities, and effectively support the causes we care about.
Creating Healthy Media Boundaries
So how do we create these boundaries in a media-saturated world? Here are some approaches I've found helpful:
Set specific times for news consumption. Maybe you check headlines in the morning but skip the news before bed (a game-changer for sleep quality, trust me!).
Be selective about sources. Choose media outlets that report facts without sensationalizing trauma. Your nervous system will thank you.
Use technology tools. Most phones now have screen time limits and content restrictions you can customize. I've set mine to lock certain apps after 9pm, and it's been surprisingly freeing.
Practice body awareness. Notice how your body feels when consuming certain content. Tension in your shoulders? Shallow breathing? Racing heart? These are your body's way of saying "enough for now."
Create transition rituals. After consuming difficult content, give yourself a moment to reset—maybe a short walk, a cup of tea, or even just a few deep breaths. Small shifts can make a big difference.
These practices align with what I call "creating safety within" in The Cozy Method. By honoring our nervous system's signals rather than pushing through them, we build a foundation of self-trust that supports sustainable engagement with the world.
The Power of Intentional Consumption
When we make conscious choices about our media diet, we're not hiding from reality. We're creating the internal conditions necessary to engage with it meaningfully.
I've found that when I limit my exposure to distressing content, I actually have more—not less—energy for real-world relationships. I have more emotional bandwidth for the people right in front of me. I can listen without getting mentally overwhelmed. I can respond thoughtfully rather than react from a triggered place.
Research in neuroscience supports this approach. A 2021 study in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that individuals who practiced intentional media consumption reported greater subjective well-being and higher levels of prosocial behavior than those who consumed news indiscriminately.
Honoring Your Unique Sensitivity
For those healing from early loss or childhood trauma, this kind of boundary-setting isn't optional—it's essential. The path from survival to safety requires us to recognize and honor our individual thresholds.
In developing The Cozy Method program, I've considered how our sensitivity isn't a weakness to overcome, but valuable information about what we need. Sometimes what we need most is permission to filter the overwhelming input of a hyperconnected world.
If you find yourself feeling guilty about needing these boundaries (been there!), consider this reframe: your sensitivity—your deep capacity to feel and care—is precisely what makes your contribution to the world valuable. Protecting that sensitivity isn't selfish; it's stewardship of an important resource.
A Gentle Invitation
Today, I invite you to reflect on your own media consumption habits. How does scrolling through certain content make you feel? What news sources leave you informed versus overwhelmed? Notice how different types of content affect your energy, your mood, and your capacity to be present in your life.
Consider experimenting with some boundaries, not as restriction but as protection of something precious—your attention, your emotional well-being, your capacity for genuine connection.
Remember that creating these boundaries isn't about disconnecting from the world's pain. It's about connecting with it in a way that's sustainable—a way that allows your empathy to be channeled into meaningful action rather than depleted through passive consumption.
Because sometimes, the most revolutionary healing happens not when we force ourselves to witness everything, but when we create tiny moments of safety and self-trust within.
What media boundaries have worked for you?